If child custody is an issue in your divorce, your attorney will likely take your spouse’s deposition and your spouse’s attorney will likely take yours. Below are typical questions that a divorce lawyer may ask the opposing spouse at a deposition regarding child custody concerns.

For all cases

• Who has been the primary caretaker?
• What was the husband/father’s involvement in prenatal care, birthing classes, and the birth?
• Describe a typical day in the life of each child.
• Who is responsible for preparing the children’s meals and supervising their food choices?
• Who is responsible for bathing, dressing, grooming, etc.?
• Who is responsible for school registration?
• Do you volunteer at the children’s school? Describe your volunteer activities? Time spent per week or month?
• What extracurricular activities do the children participate in?
• Who is responsible for signing children up for extracurricular activities?
• Who is responsible for keeping track of the activities, transportation to and from, uniforms and equipment, snacks, etc.?
• Are both you and your spouse involved in parent-teacher conferences? School events?
• Who helps with homework?
• Are either of you involved with coaching, tutoring, or other hands on involvement in the children’s school and other activities?
• How do you discipline the children?
• How does your spouse discipline the children?
• Who makes decisions about the children’s religious education?
• Who do the children turn to when hurt, sick, or sad?
• Was a typical day in your life and the lives of the children different before the divorce? How?

It is not unusual for the parent who has not been the primary caretaker to become considerably more involved in the children’s lives once a divorce has been filed. It is, therefore important for the attorneys to explore both the pre and post divorce day-to-day responsibility for the children.

Additional questions when both parents are working full-time

Today there are fewer and fewer stay-at-home parents, as both parents often work to support the family. When both parties are employed outside the home, additional factors come into play.

• Who is responsible for taking the children to school or daycare and picking them up after school or daycare?
• Who is the primary contact person at school?
• Who does the school call if child needs to picked up?
• How is the housework divided between you and your spouse?
• Does one of you do more work around the house than the other?
• If the children need to be taken to the doctor for sickness or injury, who misses work?
• If daycare provider is unavailable, who misses work?